Just Like George...

I don’t know how to describe “him”. I don’t know how to start. For more than 20 years that we’ve been together, doing this and that, talking about this, criticizing about that… was it watching “My Best friend’s Wedding” for the nth time that drove me to get my pen and write about him? Yup, this guy…my buddy!

We had always been mistaken as steadies. Maybe because we’ve been partners since we were kids. Programs, church activities, hosting, I was very identified with him, and he with me. If I were around, “Where is he?” people would ask, and vice versa. When I woke up, it was a routine to look at the window to see if he was already awake sitting on their terrace especially the morning after a gimmick, signaling to each other: “Did you throw up?” or “napagalitan ka ba?” (You grounded?). And of course, there were arguments – many, in fact! He was always irritated by my laziness – starting a project then leaving everything to him when I couldn’t handle it anymore. He budgeted his money well and could account even to the last penny, while I don’t know where my money went. And many more incidents I love to cherish and reminisce.

We grew up fast, yes. And even that we started to live apart and tried to find each of our own path, we were still “partners”. People still look and ask when one of us is not around. “Bakit nga ba hindi kayo?”. Kung sana nga lang … Kung sana nga lang ano? (Why don't you two hook up? I wish that were the case.)

If only he doesn’t walk and act more feminine than I do? If only he doesn’t talk much more than I do? If only he doesn’t eat with more finesse than I do? If only he’s not a gay? People had known him like that. Maybe, he had acted differently. Friends had accepted him to be that way, ‘though no one had ever asked what he really feels about it and I guess, nobody dared. BUT it’s not being a gay or not, or the supposedly “chance” that we can be”us”. It’s not a question of what he really is or the chance for him to change. They’ve never seen the real “MAN” inside this guy. They’ve never seen what I’ve seen in him all these years.

I was afraid to cross-busy streets. He was always on the danger side to help me get over that fear. I was bored and lonely. He was there to make me laugh and forget about my sadness. He danced with me even though I was a difficult partner to swing with. I had the longest stories to tell. They never heard it. He patiently listened… every single detail of it. I’ve fallen in and out of love. I’ve met guys who loved and hurt me. They didn’t see me cry. He’d seen me. I’ve passed and failed opportunities. They’ve never seen how excited or disappointed I was. He’d seen it. He did simple to most sensible things for me that I guess my fingers and toes aren’t enough to count them all. Maybe they’ve seen the “soft” part of him … but they’ve never seen the “tough” guy inside of him. He’s a different kind of person … my different kind of man … my one of a kind of friend!

And after a year and a half of not seeing each other (first time to happen in our 27 years of existence!), all I wanted was to hug him and tell him how much I missed him. And I do regret that I didn’t! Wanted so much to stay late with him, talk about our experiences for the past year apart, get drunk, laugh, sing, cry, whatever! But so sad, we didn’t get the chance to do all those things. ‘Guess, we’re all busy with our own routines now. And of course, I understand.

And so I went back to my new world, work…work…work… and watch one of my favorite movies AGAIN: MY BESTFRIEND’S WEDDING! He’s not “GEORGE” and I’m not “JULES”. But we have a FRIENDSHIP somehow like what they have … NO, maybe much stronger and more comforting! And with the Lord between us, I know it will stay for a long… long… long time!